Question 3: Is Your Desire to Love and to Be Loved Merely Conditional, or Unconditional?
We not only have the power to love (i.e., the power to be naturally connected to another human being in profound empathy, care, self-gift, concern, and acceptance), we have a “sense” of what this profound interpersonal connection would be like if it were perfect.
This sense of perfect love has the positive effect of inciting us to pursue ever more perfect forms of love. However, it has the drawback of inciting us to expect ever more perfect love from others.
This generally leads to frustrated expectations of others and consequently to a decline of relationships that can never grow fast enough to match this expectation of perfect and unconditional love.
The evidence for our awareness of and desire for perfect love can be seen in our capacity to ecognize every imperfection of love in others and in ourselves.
How could we have this seemingly unlimited capacity to recognize imperfection in love without having some sense of what perfect love would be like? Without at least a tacit awareness of perfect love, we would be quite content with any manifestation of affection that just happens to come along.
Do you, the reader, have a capacity to recognize imperfection of love in others and yourself? Do you do this seemingly without limit? If so, could you do this without some sense of what perfect love would be like?
And if you have this awareness of and desire for perfect love, would you be content with anything less? Do you want to continue the pursuit of love until you have arrived at what you truly desire?
If so, then you will have also affirmed within yourself the intrinsic desire for unconditional love, which leads to the next question.